First 2-day trip together

Relieve.Happy. All positive thoughts. May 25, 2013 marks our first trip as family; Ate, Jaden, papa and me. It was also the first time ate and Jaden ride a bus. Everytime we see buses, ate would always ask when will she be able to ride a bus. We had a company outing. Our first stop was lake sebu, it was super tiring at lake sebu because we have to walk, the road is steep and I have to carry a heavy backpack. Next was the Punta Isla Resort, still in lake sebu. We had lake tour there and lunch. Then we went to Dolores Tropicana Resort at Tambler General Santos. We spend the night there. The following morning we went to Lemlunay Resort to try their infinity pool and their dive spot. We end our trip with a visit at SM General Santos.

The first thing that I observed with ate is that she instantly rekindled her friendship with the other kids NOT her age. Well the kids in the trip were 7 years old and above. Jaden was the youngest. The 2 kids are from her ballet classes and the other kid was from her daycare years, which was a year ago. The other kid she met when she was 2 years old. All through out the trip ate was with her friends. She always ask permission to be with her friends, to play with her friends and to stroll the places with her friends. When swimming, she is also with her friends all the time but we were there to look at them for safety reasons. Her friends all had swimming lessons so I was a little bit wary since ate has none.

On the other hand, Jaden also showed that she won't be a baggage too heavy to carry. She walks on her own, swims on her own, plays with the other kids and she did not quarrel with anybody (except a few petty squabble with ate). She also volunteered to join the other kids, with ate of course, walking within the premises of Dolores Tropicana Resort. It was Jaden's first away from home, and it was not at all a bad experience for us. She has shown signs of maturity and indepence for her age. The downfall was that she stumbled many times because she would not let us hold her hands while walking. She wants to do it herself.

We don't have a family picture though. Ate has her own activities to deal with and it does not involve us, unfortunately. I realize that time flies so fast. Ate will become her own girl, soon lady and next woman. We will be there to make sure that ate will choose her friends and activities wisely. She may have a mind of her own but she still needs proper guidance, support and lots of love. I hope her being friendly does not mean that she is looking for someone to cling on and who will love her, because we gave her enough of those already. I do pray that she will not betray our trust and confidence.

Till our next travel. I hope it will be on an airplane.

Married Life with kids

GUILTY AS CHARGED. I was reading the local newspaper, The Mindanao Daily Mirror, when I came across an article, A stronger marriage, even with the kids by Ana Theresa F. Basilio. Children are beautiful, but they're not the sole purpose of marriage, the article said it was coming from Charles Schmitz, PhD.He added, "one of the negative ways a baby affects marriage is the amount of time and energy he or she requires from her parents. A parent who cares for this demanding human day and night may have little left to offer his or her spouse. The lack of intimacy that can result and cause resentment on one or both sides can be crippling."

As a mother I want to be hands on with my children. I want to spend as much time as possible with them. Sometimes, my husband may feel neglected but we were in it in the first place. We both decided to have children. With that decision comes with responsibility. We have a responsibility to our children and whatever happens, negative or positive, will be a reflection of how we raise them. I guess and I pray that my husband will understand, the same manner I understand why he has to attend to our children more. These are helpless individuals who needs proper guidance, love and care from their parents in their growing years. As parents it is our obligation to instill values, to be a good example for them to emulate. As parents we need to prepare them for a life of their own.

Maturity and prayers are also important weapons in preserving a marriage. There are times when you feel weak, pressured and just have enough of everything, adding to the scenario is your crying baby and she doesn't seem to stop even if you did everything already. The next thing you realize you are nagging your husband. Shouting at him that you've done everything into this marriage and he has done nothing. Before you do this, take a deep breath and pray hard. Maturity will tell you that it will not help any if you nag. It will just add turmoil and hurt.

Children makes a family. However, the future of that family lies on the hands of the parents. Parents should recognize that there is another person added to the dynamics of being husband and wife, and that is their child. As cliche as is may sound, children are a blessing from God. Indeed they are. For me, they are my angels, they are the source of my serenity. I hope every parent feels the same.